Thursday, July 23, 2015

While the cat is away...

Mrs ERJ is visiting her friend Linda in the downriver, Detroit area.

Mrs ERJ met Linda back in 19-mumble-mumble at MSU.  Unbeknownst to them, they were both dating the same young man, a young man who felt no need to share that information.  Upon mutually learning of the others existence, they took a long walk to sort things out.  They both dumped the bounder and have been close friends ever since.

Linda's life has been more than chaotic.  She retired this year and moved from Central Ohio back to her hometown to care for her aging mother. Knowing her need for space, Linda bought her own home.  Mrs ERJ will be seeing it for the first time.  They will talk until their jaws cramp.  They will go to bed way too late.  They will wake up in the morning and start talking with their first breath.  They will go to a coffee shops that does not resemble assembly lines and where nobody is in a rush.  Ronald McDonald will be nowhere in sight.  They will buy dainty, sweet nothings and hot drinks.  And the sweet nothings and hot drinks will sit on the table and cool off while they talk, talk, talk.

Here on the home front


Here on the home front we put on a brave face.  We do all of those things we dare not do whilst Mrs ERJ is on duty.  Some of us will eat Froot Loops directly out of the box, a fistful at a time.  Others will put refined sugar on our bran flakes....and we will do it boldly, with no quick, darting, furtive glances over our shoulder.  We will drink 2% milk ---damned the skimmed!--- and go boldly in the sun without SPF!!!  We will order out pizza on a THURSDAY.  We will stride about like Colossus, like Masters of the Universe.

No, really


I have a list of chores to get done.  One of them is to reseat a toilet where the bolt that holds down the stool broke or pulled through the collar.  I need to get replacement bolts and a new wax ring....I am sure all home owners know the drill.

No salt, no spice, no cheese or mushrooms, low fat


I am also on the schedule to take may parents a meal.  Each of my siblings has a day to bring them dinner.  Our day is Friday.  Mrs ERJ and I take turns doing the planning and execution of the meal.  We bounce ideas off of each other.  The meals tend to be simple and repetitive due to the restrictions.

My dad cannot spices (upset stomach), fats (gall bladder) or salt (blood pressure, vertigo). He also dislikes corn bread and the taste of molasses, both of which he ate great quantities of during the Great Depression.

My mom has allergy issues with cheese, mushrooms and aged products.

Together, they do not eat enough to keep a small bird alive.  They are at a time in their life when they don't move as much as they used to.  They do not have the muscle mass that they used to.  It just does not take very many calories to keep them going.

Usually we make them a piece of broiled fish or chicken, some steamed vegetables...whatever is in season, a wee spot of carbs like boiled new potatoes and a tiny sweet something.  In all, about as much food as you might pack in a 4th grader's lunch.

Tomorrow I am flying solo on this project.

Don't worry.  I will wash my hands very, very thoroughly before preparing their dinner.

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